Own life

In conclusion. I will never have my own life that I want. 

Restart failed

And I thought I got a new life and I will stop. 

But no. Here I am again. Maybe is my problem or maybe is because my new life is not new at all. 

Just give me one last good Saturday

Ok, first of all, I know posting this kind of stuff here is kinda weird and stupid. 

But still, whoever see this blog post, please please please pray for me that tomorrow and Sunday no need to work. I am desperate need your pray. Thanks . crying

Hope for new life

What I hope that dis is really the starting of the turning point of my life. 

Please let me go smoothly for years. No lay off no super drama please 

PRAY HARDER TRY HARDER CLEAN HARDER

JUST 2 MONTHS. NEW LIFE. PROMISE MYSELF OK?

加油

加油。 你一定行的。
坚持下去吧！
说好最少一个月。

害怕

人，
往往都是在事情就快要发生的那一刻
会害怕越来越多东西


我害怕
无法在十一月之前开始我的社会生活
就算开始了社会生活，
我又害怕我会被困在同一个地方
即使可以不被困在同一个地方
我又害怕会有人想尽办法留下来
就算没有人反对我
我又害怕那个新的地方无法得到我要的东西

祈求谁都好，控制我命运的那家伙，
让我顺顺利利过掉这四个害怕的东西吧。

目前的我更害怕
我下个礼拜会破戒。。。。
不要了，拜托。
乖一点好吗。。。。

Situation

I am into something that when i am not doing it. I need to do it.
But when i am doing it. I regret that i shouldnt do it.

Well the one who got hurt the most is not me. Is him.

寂寞

今天不是第一次，但今天却突然间觉得一个人做这事会觉得寂寞。甚至睡下去时竟然一直觉得自己身边有其他人，但张开眼睛，却是我自己罢了。

This is the last time

I am such a dumb.
Like really really dumb.
Dumber than blonde dumb.

Why would u still want to be 'friend' with a faker when u know the faker started to fake since 7 years ago?

Thats right, 7 years.

After the 'fuck you' incident on last saturday,
Lets hope that we will never contact each other again, like ever.

Fuck off, faker.

Useless

I am so useless, i said no, i said stop, but i am still here and going on......

Someone, can someone help me to control it?

No!

Because of weekly continuously consuming, i think i cant live to stop it.

But i must. No means no!
Dun create record, but set a record.
At least 4 months! Which is by september!
I must not touch it ever!!
No!

恢复

过了这个下午，
一切恢复原状
如果要再重复，
请在明年才重复 。

万一忘记了，请看这篇 post.
谢谢
好好照顾自己

命

我只想告诉你，
你命好，命苦，
我都会呆在你身边。

待会的面试 加油
愿能成功！

Eternal?

Do u think we will last eternally?

如果可以的话，下一世让我在和你继续这一世的姻缘吧…
没有别人 也没有别的东西

预感

如果有一天，
我就这样突然间不在了。

你会如何。。。。。。。？

多好

如果下一次 和以后都是这样那就好了  … 但还是很危险